Coffee With an INTJ

 Hey, y'all! Today I sat down with my good friends Rena, the INTJ. INTJs are one of my absolute favorites out of the types (I know I said that about INFPs last time as well, but like, we stan INxx's :)). As an INFJ, I feel like they are the type that I understand and that understands me the most, most likely because we share our dominant and inferior cognitive functions. As intellectual, witty, and reserved people, INTJs have my utmost respect, and I am very grateful that I had the opportunity to learn more about them. Please do keep in mind that not all INTJs are the same, and although they are all somewhat similar in personality (obviously lol), this is the opinion of one INTJ and can not be said to be 100% accurate across the board. I hope you enjoy!

    What is your biggest fear?

    Oh, that is a very complicated question. Generally speaking, I feel like the most accurate fear I could give you would be failure. I am a major perfectionist and I have the constant philosophy of if I don't do it perfectly the first time, I am a failure as a person.  But then I look at all I have done, all I have achieved, and I realize that I'm not a failure. So that one, after a while, has become dumb after many mental conversations has become a bit numb. That one is applicable to everyday life. But along with that, a more widescale anxiety is whether or not I am going to be able to find many people to... tolerate me because I have a very complicated way of thinking, and most people think I just want to murder them. I find it very difficult to talk to others and it takes me years to really open up to them. I know that's kind of an ironic thing, an INTJ to be afraid of being alone, but yeah, that's one of my biggest fear. 

    What type of vibe do you think you give off?

    People tell me that I give off a scary, murderous vibe. I do think that's more of a joke though. But I do think I give off more of an intimidating vibe.

    What vibe would you like to give off?
    The kind of vibe I would like to give iff is of a respectable, intelligent, wise person. I don't want to seem really friendly in all honesty. I want others to be mildly intimidated so that they don't approach me,  but I only want some people to feel that way?? I know it isn't possible but I like sorting through people who I feel comfortable with by which ones aren't uncomfortable approaching me. I want to be mildly feared and greatly respected. And I want to seem insightful. Most importantly, I just want to reflect Christ with my attitude. I don't think I have to be super approachable and outgoing to do that.

    How does one know if they have gained the friendship of an INTJ?
    They start to open up more. At least I do. I have major trust issues so it takes me a while to really spill my heart and I'd never do it to more than one person at a time. And I feel less drained. If you don't mentally drain an INTJ and they openly tell you that, you're probably pretty close. It's also about the comfort of silence. I hate it when people try to force noise into an environment. When silence is no longer awkward for either person, you're also pretty close. 

    What do you do in your free time?
    I paint a lot, I listen to music, I have a few OCs, I read classical literature, I just binge vines sometimes, and I have an N64 with a few games that I like.

    What MBTI types do you feel yourself most naturally being drawn towards?
    INFP and INFJ. I really badly want to talk to more INTPs but I'm socially incompetent and so are they sooo. 

    By which types are you repelled?
    ENTP, ESTP, and I avoid most people so pretty much all of them but ES types probably wouldn't be great for me.. and I don't get along great with ISFJs as far as I know. But ESTP and ENTP repel me. Truly.

    Do you ACTUALLY want to murder everyone?
    Only sometimes. But I would never murder [insert our INFP friends, our ISFP friend, and me]. (I'm honored).

    How would you describe your taste in music?
    My taste in music is vast and expanding, but the vibe is something I could listen to in either an abandoned mansion or a foggy forest trail.

    How do you genuinely not care what others think of you?
    They're mostly incompetent. I only care if they're educated. Would you listen to a carpenter if they tried to critique your baking? People almost never understand what I'm doing with my work, so why listen to their advice? And I don't want to be like them. I have my own goals for my self-image, so who cares?? I know what I want and I refuse to let uneducated imbeciles try to convince me that I don't. I don't see all people like that, and I actually really appreciate advice and criticism if we're on the same page. But generally speaking, that's why. 

    Do you prefer complete silence or having some background noise as you work?
    It depends on my mood. I can't give a consistent answer to that. But I usually listen to music.

    What are some things that most people do that annoy you?
    Where do I start?? Claiming that awkward silence is a thing, yelling for no reason, lack of wit, desperate and pathetic cries for attention like we don't already know that they're there from all of the stupid things they're already doing, trying to randomly give me advice when I don't ask for it, chewing with their mouth open, vulgar language (just expand your general vocabulary), disrespect, ignoring instruction, thinking that I'm wrong when I'm obviously intellectually superior (not all the time), having the audacity to try to talk to me when I have headphones in or I'm obviously reading or writing. There are a few more but those are the most prominent.

    Do you spend all of your time truly reflecting on the failures in our society, or is that just a stereotype?
    No. There are too many failures for me not to get depressed. I'm angsty, but definitely not THAT angsty. 

    Is the stereotype that INTJs are devoid of all emotion really true?
    No. I just don't show it. I'm a really emotional person and so is my dad (both INTJ). You have to be really close to us to know it tho. That goes back to the how do you know if you're close question. 

    Would you consider yourself shy, or merely anti-social?
    Antisocial. I actually really like public speaking about the right topics. I'm not shy, I just don't like people and unnecessary conversation. 

    What's your favorite color?
    I don't have a specific one, but some of my favorites are deep emerald green, burgundy/blood red, and a dark cobalt blue. And deep purples are great. Oh and all gemstones.

    And finally, what do you consider to be your worst personality trait?

    My perfectionism hurts me a lot, and so does my social wall. They're both unhealthy coping mechanisms. 

All my thanks goes to Rena for allowing me to interview her. She is a very bright, well-spoken young lady and I can genuinely say this was one of my favorite interviews thus far. I hope you all enjoyed it!! Thank you for visiting my blog and God bless!!